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Roxanne ✨'s avatar

This is a very interesting piece to read!

As a Muslim, I’ve always felt like those who say music is prohibited or disliked were being a bit extra. Some scholars say it depends on the context, others reject it completely if instruments are used.

Some argue it’s because music can distract us or carry bad meanings, and some even say it can control the mind. I used to think that was exaggerated… until I noticed how people react to songs: “I was fine, then this sad song ruined my mood,” or “I was over my ex, then this song made me text him.” That really hit me.

Whether it’s prohibited/ disliked or not, I think our emotions and actions should be in our hands, not controlled by melodies. It’s okay to enjoy music sometimes if we wanna dance, but not to let it run our mood or become constant background noise.

Honestly, I might be smarter if I listened less 😂 cause when I listen I just zone out and do nothing, instead of thinking. Thank you for writing this, it really made me think. Next time, I’ll leave my headphones in another room!

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Pearl's avatar

Music can trigger so many memories and emotions that we have no control over!! and I agree, people should use music more wisely!!

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rayaan's avatar

as a muslim i used to also think the same, and like you said theres differences of opinion. but my realisation began after my 2022 wrapped where i was a whopping 124k minutes, 19k just listening to Duster because I was going through a tough time so all my top songs and artists were depressing. while i hadn't realised that depressing songs weren't validating my emotional state like i told myself they were, i realised 'woah i should probably cut down those minutes and maybe listen to more quran than duster'.

so 2023 my minutes were roughly halved, about 72k, and my minutes for quran was a couple thousand higher than the minutes i had listen to my top artist (arctic monkeys) and i though alright this is good, i still continued listening to music regularly. my minutes for 2024 were less again, 29k, and i had also started uni in autumn 2023 and made it sort of a rule for myself that during my 1h commute into london almost daily, it would be better to listen to quran over music because an hour of sitting is a while. id also listen to quran while walking (and i walked A LOT just for the fun of it, usually 2 or 3h straight). so quran when im outside, music when im at home.

i also started exploring more reciters, i love yasser al dosari, maher al muaiqly, i had a phase where i listened to loads of fatih sefaragic. 2025 i sort of challenged myself i go as long as i could without music and just listen to quran. my mind felt so much clearer it was crazy how much i hadnt realised the way songs were constantly on loop in my mind, leading me to neglect my own thoughts. ive come to know myself much more now that i can hear myself. and when i do listen to a song or two occasionally (usually for the nostalgia, nostalgia is addictive) the song gets sooo stuck in my head in a way i hadnt realised before, and it takes says of not listening to music to get it out. ive realised that some people are like sponges and others like stones in regards to how they absorb what they consume. some people can watch hundreds of shows and movies and listen to hundreds of songs and still walk around with a clear mind, with little effects on their emotional state. others like me, being very attached to whatever i watch or listen to. i have even avoided shows and movies for ages because i get too emotionally invested and attached and they become the sole thing i think about for weeks, and im surprised i didnt realise i also absorb music just as easily.

ive come to learn a lot about myself now that there isnt a constant background anytime im alone with myself, and i realised i listened to music a lot before to either amplify or validate my emotional state, or to avoid it, and that led me to not understand myself for ages (which does terrible things for your identity). i havent completely outlawed music for myself because i feel like that can lead to the journey feeling a lot more forced, and almost makes you crave it more and it feels harder to abstain, but with everything ive realised about how much it impacts me, by choice i rarely listen these days and ive fallen in love with listening to quran when doing almost anything.

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Roxanne ✨'s avatar

That’s inspiring!!

You are so right, I am trying so hard to let go of that toxic habit honestly, thank you for telling me about your experience.

Jazakum Allah Khayran!!

May Allah bless you ❤️

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rayaan's avatar

may allah bless you as well! most important thing i would say is to not be too hard on yourself, its best to make a choice from a place of understanding rather than out of pressure or force 💕

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siddhi's avatar

this is what I thought of when I was reading this essay. I'm not a Muslim, but I'm aware of music being forbidden, and it made me wonder if these were the reasons lol

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GhostNode's avatar

The post was about music. Not religion. Not identity. Just music. You don’t need to filter everything through ‘as a [x] I feel…’ Just say what you think. Be a person. Not a performance.

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Roxanne ✨'s avatar

Umm, mentioning religion was a secondary thing to me, but I suppose you misunderstood the whole point.

And when someone shares an opinion, of course it’s going to come through their own lens, how they felt it, how they understood it, and what it meant to them. That’s what it means to have a perspective. Identity is part of that. It’s what makes people people, not blank slates.

That’s literally how books, literature, and art gain meaning , people from different backgrounds discussing them through their own experiences . Identity isn’t a distraction; it’s depth. It’s appreciated from every direction and aspect.

No one said I wasn’t a person, I’m fully aware I’m not a chair or a pigeon, thanks 🙄.

And throwing around the word ‘ performance ’ just because it’s trendy doesn’t make it relevant rn.

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لـو's avatar

What happened? 🤣 Did you get upset by the mention of Islam?”

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sara's avatar

this is powerful. as enjoyable as music can be, it can overpower you and numb you. sometimes we need to let our bodies sit in silence, to take in our surroundings, and use that silence to think hard and to even converse with God. i particularly like the vulnerability here. excellent post!! :)

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Pearl's avatar

Thank you so much <33 and yes the silence was awkward at first but I've adapted to it and became more grounded !!

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sara's avatar

this!!!!

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sara's avatar

not me typing this as balkan music blasts into my ears while commuting home from work

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Pearl's avatar

loool its okay 😭

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liana 𐙚 ♡ ⁴⁴⁴'s avatar

i loved this!! you ate

music is amazing and it can influence your mind, which is why i do not often listen to olivia rodrigo esp the track 'Making the Bed,' 'Ballad of a Homeschooled Girl,' cause it's too real for me and i noticed it's like a depressant lol

I unironically practice mindfully stepping away from music, just listening to myself and the world around me, it has a meditative effect. and when i get back to listening to music, it even sounds better. it's like listening to the songs for the first time again. 🩷

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Pearl's avatar

Thank you!! it does have an interesting effect on the mind and sometimes taking a break from something and getting back to it can be very refreshing :)

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Meaghan Green's avatar

“No I didn’t have a lobotomy” 😂

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Pearl's avatar

I had to clarify that 😭

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Justin Travis's avatar

This is a fine essay and while the subject matter is focused on the use of music as "escape" in your case, the broader point is well made that what we use our time on is integral and that how we act constitutes our being, music choice itself is fascinating as taste is relevant to beliefs, with that said it was nice to see Mitski on your list as a small aside and compliment.

I would question you on what it means to be "disconnected from reality" but I believe I understand what you meant as displacing your time into activities that didn't serve a greater flourishing or purpose in regard to your self.

As for my own thoughts on music it is one of the greatest expressions of humanity as it encompasses the entire emotional spectrum from dirges to sweeping ballads, folk music, trap music, etc, there are genres for all, it also speaks to one of the core tenets of my beliefs in entrainment, which is resonance to that which speaks to us on an embodied level, it is felt before it is properly "understood".

Looking forward to your writing as you shape it.

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Pearl's avatar

Thank you so much!! I really appreciate your thoughtful comment. When I said “disconnected from reality,” I meant moments like being on a trip in Madrid with my family but staying in my own world by walking behind them, blasting music and not engaging at all. I’d always tune everything out, regardless who I am with or the place I'm in. Music became a way to avoid rather than connect. Grateful you took the time to read and respond :)

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crumbs ✿'s avatar

for the past few days i've actually tried to not listen to music, something in me healed because i could focus on reality

but something in me needed it back :,)

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annika's avatar

i didn’t think i was going to relate to this before i clicked the headline (which is why i clicked it) - but i really really do! ive also recently stopped listening to music to fill the gaps of my day (cooking, driving, showering, etc.) and i’ve found that being in silence helps me to be more in touch with my creativity, and i love that.

thank you for writing this insightful piece!!!

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Pearl's avatar

So glad it resonated with you! Silence really does open up space for creativity 🤍

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JC Denton's avatar

Maybe start looking at older music? Pick something you're completely unfamiliar with: I recommend jazz. Get into it.

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Pearl's avatar

I was actually into jazz! but I get your point :)

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Jason Chastain's avatar

I think it’s a natural progression of maturing. Adults still enjoy music, but they don’t think on it, ponder it the way young people do.

The things people talk about shift through various phases in their lives. It’s normal for teenagers and those in their 20s perhaps to talk about music. In your 30s and 40s you talk about marriage, kids, sports, the latest news. In your 50s and 60s you talk about Milestones, children graduating, health issues, travel. But yeah, in the 50s and above the topics in increasingly revolve around health, the latest procedures, etc. It makes me laugh every time I speak to anyone over the age of 60, it’s all medical. 😂

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Pearl's avatar

Hahaha so true, I’ve definitely noticed that shift already!!

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Simone's avatar

This made me realize I probably listen to music a bit too much! Thank you for this insightful and well-written piece.

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Pearl's avatar

Thanks! I felt the same way when I first realized it too.

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M767's avatar
10hEdited

I noticed the same thing in my own life like a year ago as well, I use music as either a distraction from my problems or as a facilitator to wallow in them, so I started forcing myself to gradually listen to different music, to widen my musical horizons and so that I listen to music I haven’t attached emotional baggage to, and ramped up my podcast habit and got on Libby to start listen to audiobooks again.

Music can be nurturing to the soul, but like the physical body, forcing yourself to gorge past your fill is gonna leave you sick and queasy.

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Pearl's avatar

Same here. I’ve been leaning more into audiobooks and podcasts lately, since music started feeling too emotionally loaded :)

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Stefan's avatar

good read.

I listen to less music because I have hearing loss

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Pearl's avatar

Thanks! Sorry to hear that, hope you still enjoy the sounds you can :)

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Stefan's avatar

Appreciate you for pointing out the fact that music can be omnipresent in our lives.

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Pearl's avatar

Music’s everywhere these days and it’s crazy how much it shapes our mood and space without us even realizing!!

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Otto the Renunciant's avatar

I'm a musician, but I don't really listen to music anymore outside of the times when I'm writing it for mainly the reasons you listed here. I do think, however, that the usefulness of music depends highly on what it brings out in you. There is some music that can serve as a reset button when the mind is inclining in unwholesome directions, and there is music that will push it further in those directions. It's similar to psychedelics, in a way: not an ultimate truth or cure for the world's ills, but potentially a useful tool until the point that one is ready to give it up or "hang up the phone".

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Pearl's avatar

That's such a thoughtful way to put it! I like the idea of music being something you grow with, and eventually grow out of in some ways :)

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elio's avatar

i've always been an under-20k-minutes-per-year listener. i love music, but i hate having extra sound in my ears if i'm doing something else, so i usually only put on music if i'm actually focusing on it (e.g. if i'm on a long bus ride and just staring out the window, or if i'm at home and want to listen to a specific album i'll lie down and close my eyes and listen to it). i also know that music can affect my emotions a lot, so i've been trying to be a lot more mindful of that.

for me, music is best when it's about sharing and experiencing it with others. i love singing in choirs, and i love going to concerts and enjoying my favourite songs with hundreds of other fans. i come from a nation where music has always been a tool to strengthen the community and fight for our freedom, so i guess its in my blood.

i also love music as a way of self expression, or as a creative outlet - i sing and write songs sometimes, and i can play some ukulele and piano. singing, in general, is one of my favourite things to do. but to just constantly consume music is not that different from constantly consuming text posts or videos online, i think. it becomes just another distraction from the real world and an external thing that influences your mind and your emotions, rather than something to engage with mindfully.

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Pearl's avatar

Yeah, that makes a lot of sense. I like how you balance enjoying music deeply and not just having it on all the time. Really cool way to think about it :)

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Oatmilk Allison's avatar

I've stopped bringing my headphones with me wherever I go to play music. So if I do play something, say, on a walk, I play it just from my phone. I feel that it gives my mind so much more space just to think and feel, rather than constantly in a state of consuming or downing out myself.

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Pearl's avatar

wow. It's really cool to shift the proximity of the music from your ears, as it helps you feel more grounded and connected to your surroundings, while enjoying music at the same time!

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Babs & Co The Table Over There's avatar

I wonder how does it affect you when you go into a shop or cafe and your favourite music is playing.

Do you dream about music?

Do you even wake up and for no reason a certain song keeps playing in your head?

I can go without intentionally putting on music but I hear music in my dream sometimes and if, like today, a song I heard recently somewhere comes to me and doesn't leave me alone, I can't not sing it.

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Pearl's avatar

I would most likely vibe to it haha. That's an interesting thing to say, I never dreamt about music. But, I do find myself thinking randomly about certain songs some days, which doesn't really bother me as it doesn't last long.

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Babs & Co The Table Over There's avatar

It lasts all day for me! I keep singing the same song, it won't leave me alone!😂

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Pearl's avatar

oh god it’s haunting you at this point 😂😂

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